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    Original :http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/online_communities.png-(986 KB, 1024x968, internet journey.png)
    986 KB Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)12:59:33 No.26069556  
    I was born in Fall 2003 in Yahoo Games. Quickly growing tired of this, I traversed the Icy North, searching for a place to belong. I came across the nation of AOL, but I found it rather dangerous, threatening to suck me into its noobish delights. I lingered for a while on one of its Chat Room isles so I could learn a bit about the world. I greatly desired to cross to the Sea of Culture, and so I procured a ship to leave the chat room. I stumbled upon the fabled Series of Tubes. It was strange to behold from my ship, the entire land a haphazard network of snaking cables. I dared not set foot on the land, so I hugged the coast.

    However, the furries of Second Life detected my ship due west of their island, and abducted me. On my civilian cruiser, I had neither the weapons nor the courage to strike these human-animal crossbreeds. They drug me across a good portion of their island, excitedly showing me the lay of the land and encouraging me to join in with their society. I was allowed a certain amount of freedom, so I took to their ways as a pretense, building up good will in my captors until a later time. One very useful skill that they taught me was that of flight. And so, as soon as they brought me to the eastern coast to show me their great lighthouse, I broke free and headed away from the island.

    It is common sense, of course, not to spend any considerable time over a large body of water without preparing for it. I kept the land of WoW always in sight, but avoided touching ground, as I was unable to find a single spot not infested with monsters or rogues. And so, continuing eastward, maintaining a constant distance from the coast, I smacked right into a gigantic, white, furry thing. Suddenly my power of flight was gone, and I frantically clung to the fur so as to slowly let myself down. I learned later that I had crashed into one of the land's beloved cats, namely, Towercat.
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)12:59:51 No.26069579
    Having been through the horrors of Second Life, I was more keen to make my arrival unknown. So I lurked. I lurked for a long time. I learned that this was a chaotic society dominated by "anonymous", that thrived on mob physics and individual stupidity. Learning the rhythm of the land, I again devised my means of escape. The server downtime on June 7, 2006 provided the chaos that I needed to steal the Party Van, always idling on the outskirts of the island, and take it to the sea. As I suspected, being an FBI-class vehicle, it came with an amphibious mode.

    However, the furries were not restricted to just the island of Second Life. I found myself in an uncharted part of the sea, with great dragons crossing the sky miles above me. The GPS unit in my armored car told me that there was land to the south, and so I followed the line of dragons flying northward and southward. What I found was astounding. It was a furry paradise unlike any I had seen on the island of rounded polygons. This was an artist's dream. Every one of the hybrids was unique and strikingly cute. The island itself had no buildings, only rolling hills and forests, with a group of furries occupying their own area separate from the others, which they called channels or rooms, an idea similar to the same Chat Rooms that I once visited. I learned later that it had floated north from the IRC Isles, having no firm connection with the other servers. Finally in a place that felt safe, I wandered from room to room, branching out and meeting many people (and so I learned to call them people and not creatures). The best of these was "ddrfurs", where some of the coolest furs gathered, many of them with ancestors from 4chan, so that even though they were exiled from anonymity, they enjoyed the random and stupid culture that resulted.
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:00:03 No.26069595
    I decided to remember this place as a potential home, but my journey was far from over. After exchanging many fond farewells, I visited my friend, a kind and wise dragon who had told me about his own travels through the years, and he agreed at once to take me to the Wikipedia Project, which he had visited and learned from many times in the past. And so we went, first southward to avoid the viral batteries of the nearby archipelago, stopping for a bit on a friendly land en route, and then westward across the Sea of Memes, until we landed on the northmost point of the network. I thanked the dragon for his great help and friendship, and he left to tell the others I had arrived safely. Having been softened considerably by the furries, I sharpened my mind with the vast knowledge Wikipedia had to offer. On the map I marked some of the libraries I lingered most on.

    I learned that much of much of Wikipedia's content was taken from the land across the Straits of Web, a land that was directly exposed to the Sea of Culture. I crossed with the weekly ferry, making a homebase for myself in Deviant Art. Having admired the great works of many of the citizens here, I contributed my part to the society as well, but I was met with scorn from the professional critics and the gifted artists, and so I left once again. Heading due north across the land, I crossed the border into Last.fm, but did not linger. I procured another boat with the scant earnings I had made from my art, and set into the sea again. Travelling westward, I discovered a little-known river called BitTorrent. It appeared to contain fresh content from Broadcaster, fueled by the many leaks in their corporations. It was clear that this river, freely flowing into the Sea of Culture, was what made the surrounding lands so wonderful. Having explored the river, I returned to the sea and continued west.
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:00:17 No.26069609
    Broadcaster must have been a productive place indeed, for the leaks that collected in the BitTorrent river were not the only ones. Airwaves from their stations had also affected the water northwest of the land, and as I passed what is now called the Gulf of Youtube, I discovered that peering into the water produced a fuzzy, yet still entertaining short movie. This was how I passed the time as I headed farther westward. Soon enough, I landed on Facebook, full of culture and wisdom. I thought at first that those living here contained the same culture I had been exposed to, but it soon became apparent that many had been born on MySpace and simply migrated over, still stupid.

    So I crossed into LJ, and discovered a multitude of people writing into databases, occasionally walking between terminals and commenting on others' entries, some maliciously badgering the others, and some becoming so progressively depressed from their own writing that they were transported to the Bay of Angst. I was fooled by the system here, believing that I could spread knowledge through these databases. And so I began to write, began to read, learned how to use my knowledge to gain an understanding of myself. But having become one of the more intelligent writers, I began to see through the others' comments, noticed how they had little substance behind their thoughts at all, and that many of my new friends were trapped in their own circles of self-hatred. I despaired that I could not help these poor souls, and I was transported, myself, into the same Bay.
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:00:50 No.26069649
    Before I left, I locked all of my posts and moved them into a location nearer the Bay for future retrieval. Now on a tiny rowboat by myself, on an unexpectedly flat sea, I travelled once more. Having learned patience from the land of LJ, I was content with my own thoughts as I inched across the water. And then, miraculously, I noticed a glimmering land to the northeast, with what appeared to be an Athenian culture on the point nearest me, a laboratory on my right and a gigantic window on my left. I landed in the Athens-like point, and the inhabitants gladly told me about their island. It was shaped like a compass rose, with Focus On Real Life on the west and Focus On Web on the east. To the north was the Practicals, who lived in a large factory, and to the south were the Intellectuals, who lived in a large laboratory. To the northwest, between Focus On Real Life and the Practicals, was an army barracks. Where I was standing, the Intellectuals applied their findings in the laboratory to real life and created a political structure. On the northeast was an office, applying practicality to the web by creating a bureaucratic system that, like the web, did absolutely nothing. On the southeast was an internet cafe, where Intellectuals met and tried to make sense of the world that had resulted from the web's birth.
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:01:02 No.26069662
    There were, in fact, two gates. The one on the western point, as I said, resembled a giant window, and led directly into another world, which they called Real Life. It is said that the entire web feels the effects of Real Life, although we are not always aware of its presence. On the east was a giant monitor, which quickly and painlessly transported you to any location in the web, allowing you the choice at any time to navigate back to the monitor and choose another location. This was astounding to me, and I gladly took up residence in the southeastern point, as near as I could manage to the gate. And so I lived the rest of my life on the compass-rose-shaped island, discussing with the others what I had learned in my travels through the world wide web.
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:01:18 No.26069687
    This might be cool if you weren't such a horribly dull writer.
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:01:24 No.26069694
         File :1178125284.jpg-(34 KB, 536x480, sort of want.jpg)
    34 KB
    this had better end with you raping someone underage.
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:01:31 No.26069701
    Your fortune: キタ━━━━━━(゚∀゚)━━━━━━ !!!!

    In during epic win.
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:03:19 No.26069817
    tl;dr

    and i usually read tl;dr
    sucks
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:06:59 No.26070093
    I didn't realize Neal Stephenson was a /b/tard.
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:08:31 No.26070186
    epic
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:09:47 No.26070278
    >>26070085
    Don't get mad at /b/ for the fact that you can't write for shit.
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:15:45 No.26070692
    you've been tainted by the furries
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:22:02 No.26071172
         File :1178126522.jpg-(197 KB, 413x604, pineapple.jpg)
    197 KB
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:25:00 No.26071401
    dull story, good effort
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:28:36 No.26071678
    fukken saved for future pasta
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:28:57 No.26071704
         File :1178126937.jpg-(146 KB, 1280x960, explosion.jpg)
    146 KB
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:32:33 No.26071929
         File :1178127153.jpg-(56 KB, 699x468, window.jpg)
    56 KB
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:38:26 No.26072298
    im sorry people that dont like this shit, i mean this is kick ass. however i CBA readin more
    >> Anonymous 05/02/07(Wed)13:39:56 No.26072388
    >>26072298
    fair enough


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